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The current mood of greenwitch at www.imood.com

moon phases

I would like to order one serving of peace and quiet and a side order of laughter, hold the sarcasim.

Well this is the day after the three days that rainman was off. I got quite a bit done, the grass had grown to amazing heights from the eight days of rain we had so I deafened myself riding the tractor to cut it. Loss of hearing can have its advantages. I weeded the front fence gardens which seemed overwhelmed completely by grass and other non flowereing greenery. I went shopping for a tie dye tee shirt for mama bears son who turned eight recently. I finished painting the rest of the living room, hallalujah, painting is out of my life for a while. Looks nice, but I am sick of standing on a step ladder. I think I will wallpaper the bathroom for a change of pace....Does it sound like I avoided my husband like the plague?

Last night I was so tired from painting and refilling the bookshelf and then I couldn't get to sleep. I may have been overtired or I may have been enraged by another display of bullshit from rainman. He gave A a bath which resulted in her crying (bathtime is usually fun...), then he sits down and starts falling asleep at 6:30pm. I had a revelation. This guy is drinking enough to be passing out in his chair after dinner. When and where is he drinking....he went out with A to do whatever...is he driving around with her in her carseat chugging whatever beverage will annihilate his senses? I may have to kill the son of a bitch.

I got back out of bed last night when I realized sleep was not possible and wrote the jerk a brief note outlining reality as I see it. I noted that if circumstances where different (ie: my parents were not calling this house home, etc.) I would not be here. I stated I now realize I made a mistake involving my parents in my life in this way. I asserted that I will live my life and do what is right for A. I let him know I know he drinks and suggested he get help for his own sake.

Got a little bit of sleep.

This morning I got out of here and took A to her last playgroup at school. When we got home rainman had left a note that he had made some calls seeking help. When I spoke to him on the phone he told me he is going to an AA meeting after work on sunday.

Oh, goodie, looks like I am going to get an upgrade from a drunk to an alchoholic, I can't wait. (I truely am getting jaded on this situation).

Otherwise, no further correspondence from the mighty photog of the past. I may send another photo his way, we shall see what mood strikes me. I must say, the mere hint of a real human being out there has kindled a new vehemence in me to change the situation I have been living under.

written at 8:18 p.m.
2001-06-01

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