moon phases � |
Summer Solstice, Hurrah!
Funny that it was so hot yesterday and today it was cool and damp with periods of gardeners rain. I felt very wiped out today and did very little. I had wanted to get out in the flower gardens but the rain began by 9:30 this morning.
I bounced around the internet this morning looking for a good barley soup recipe to use some of the whey form the cheesemaking. I managed to find the Moosewood recipe I had wanted and we had an excellent dinner.
In those other areas of my life all is as it usually is. I did speak to Rocketman today as a result of an email I sent him explaining my current state of mind. I tried to explain to him that no matter how much time I have spent with rainman, I can not keep a stiff upper lip through so much bullshit. He had implied that my "fantasies" about Elio were something to be concerned about. The bottom line is, I am human and I need human contact. I cannot rot on the vine like a neglected tomato. I will converse, I will relate, I will survive no matter the ultimate outcome of my current situation.
I finally got around to adding a guestbook to my diary last night and I want to let anyone out there who has been reading this messy story that all comments and suggestions are more than welcome. It was very nice to have received a guestbook entry so quickly after getting it set up - thank you.
One thing I have learned in this lifetime is outside input is a major contributor to maintaining perspective.
I received the good news this evening that my Aunt spent a few hours off the respirator yesterday. With any luck I will not be attending a funeral soon. After I had spoken to my cousin (not my Aunt's daughter), who is a nurse the other day, I had a very bleak picture. She was told by the surgeon that survival was a 50/50 proposition. If survival is accomplished whether months or years are available to the woman remains to be seen since only 98% of the cancer was able to be removed.
As Rosanne Rosannadanna once said, "if it's not one thing it's another..."
written at 8:48 p.m.
2001-06-21
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