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REFORMATION

The current mood of greenwitch at www.imood.com

moon phases

AAAAHHHHH, a social life. I have almost forgotten what that is. I know that when you have a kid the whole social dynamic changes. The people who have kids have less in common with the childless. The people who had kids and you never considered talking to are your peers when you have offspring. Shit, who cares, I had adult converstations today and A had playmates and we are satiated.

Today started off with rainman going into work late so I went out to check the yard sale scene. The sales were of the junk variety today so I came home and watered the veggies and flowers. Then rainman decided to make an emotional overture. Seems he is proud of himself, he has been alcohol free for nine or ten days... I remain cynical and I said so. I then took full advantage of my cell phone and called cccerberus, cross country for no extra charge. It was nice to converse with a old linked soul. We do keep up through these missives, but conversation can be even further enlightening. By this time it was midday and I had to get A out so we could get a birthday present for her friend, Rocky. We went to a nice independent book store and got her a couple of nice books. The afternoon was a pleasure. A played with Rocky and Cameron from her playgroup and Pucci, Rocky's mom, Kay, Cameron's mom, and I had a few glasses of wine, ate and caught up on each other's summers so far. In addition to the mommies, Rocky's daddy, grandparents, and a couple of assorted family friends were on hand. All very creative people and very stimulating to be around.

The mommies agreed to remain in touch and get together regularly. I believe Pucci and I will do this, Kay has some health issues with her older son that may interfere. She is also someone who always seems to feel inadequate in some way and can't quite get everygthing in place. I hope she can be social since she is a very creative and intellegent woman.

News flash....I recieved a call from Elio yesterday afternoon! It was a very nice conversation. He was immediately concerned about how "bad" it is with rainman. He was always (going back twenty five years) very much into getting problems identified and resolved. We talked about his projects, which will prevent him comming to the area. We talked about kids. We talked. It felt and sounded good. He says he will call again next week.

I was talking to mamma bear when Elio's call came in. I pretty much hung up on her since a transatlantic call should be priority, it is only polite to the transatlantic caller. Well, in her stalwart way, she questioned my motives and made a case for unfailing monogomy. Ha, she tried it and damaged herself and her children in the process. She is jumping to conclusions. I am not moving to england to be with my old flame. I am having human exchanges with an old (boy)friend. Someone who I always had a soothing connection with and although there were many years we were out of touch, that remains true. I have a right to have friends and if those friendships prove to be a safety net in the future, so be it.

One thing I think I had lost touch with and maybe an old friend like mamma bear has forgotten is that I am a very social person. I have always had long lasting, nonjudgemental relationships along with more casual and fun relationships. I have not had alot of that over the past several years and I am feeling the deficit. I need to relate to people again to move around in the world, the part of the world that I fit into, and that will be a bit unconventional.

I will reclaim my life and if things fall by the wayside, that is meant to be. If old things are renewed, so be it.

written at 8:34 p.m.
2001-07-21

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