KATYDID? KATYDIDN'T
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moon phases � |
I had a pretty good day today. We met Pucci and her daughter, Rocky, and her other child and her neice at a beautiful swimming hole at the base of what, under less dry conditions, would be a waterfall. A and Rocky had fun together and I had an afternoon of enjoyable adult conversation with Pucci. I really find Pucci fun to talk to. She and I have several perspectives in common. She is a very feminist woman who doesn't let anyone fuck with her. Her personal history is very varied and has transformed her into someone with geniune opinions, which are rare in our culture. The only thing I don't agree with her on is how harsh she can be with Rocky. The child just turned four, like A, and is very strong willed. She seems to feel left out by her older brother and cousin who have age in common. She seems angry and Pucci runs out of patience. Rocky cried today when it was time for everyone to head home. She insisted that we go to her house or she come to ours. I felt very sad for her.
A. takes all things in stride and just said simply that if Rocky wanted to come to our house so badly she should. If life could be so simple. Even when Rocky started getting tired and cranky, A. just let her do what she needed to and reinitiated play. Rocky never got angry or cranky with A., she directed her frustrations to her brother, cousin, and mother. I hope A never loses her matter of fact approach to things.
I get a new age tomorrow. Birthdays just are not what they used to be. A. is very excited that it will be my birthday. I hope rainman allows her to initiate something so she feels she has done something special. She is becomming very interested in special days and events.
Speaking of tomorrow, rainman is off for the next two days. I am still very tentative with this whole situation. I can't just forget all the bullshit and pretend it never happened. I can't just hug this guy without feeling weird. Maybe the whole thing killed whatever I once felt for rainman. The good thing is rainman is at least doing some things around the house and yard. Maybe I won't end up in traction before the summer is over.
Rewards.....the veggie garden is producing. Cucumbers, zucchini, green beans, basil and soon tomatos. The flower gardens are looking very cheerful and the front garden, which I want to be a place of peace is really beginning to look like something. I want to build a simple chair to add seating to that garden. The bench I made is nice but a chair would be good too. I started cutting the wood for the gnome home I am making out of an old stump in the front near the garden. Magrit supplied me with strips of wood for the roofing. I hope I can finish cutting the wood soon but with the heat....I don't think operating a jigsaw with sweaty hands and eyes is wise.
The katydids are beginning to sing their monotonous and hypnotic song. It seems they sing the summer into fall and are silenced when the last glimmer of summer fades. What is it that Katy did or didn't do??
Did she dance at the beltane fires and is she now with child? Did she get seduced by hades only to be trapped in the underworld while her mother searches for her regardless of the risk?
There was a bat flying around in the hallway last week. It looked like a black butterfly. Rainman couldn't find it and, I don't think believed I saw anything until he found it in a stupor on top of the aquarium the next morning. It was very small, like a field mouse with wings. Rainman put it out the window and it flew up into a red oak tree. How did it get in and how long was it inside?? Creepy in way. We have had alot of wild life around lately. Turkeys with their chicks, several type of owl hooting and screeching, a black bear near the pond on the next street. Maybe the dryness is making the animals move around more than usual for this time of year.
written at 8:33 p.m.
2001-08-06
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