MEDICINE.
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moon phases � |
It seems I have a bad case of unexplained exhaustion. Both yesterday and today, after actually getting normal amounts of sleep, I have been walking around with a bone deep tiredness that I can only describe as feeling like a fever. I checked, I don't have a fever or any other symptoms of illness. I did think about the possibility that I have a bleeding ulcer from the anti-inflamatories I took for my perfectly normal but painful left elbow. I got a vivid picture of my blood slowly seeping out through my stomach and causing my blood pressure to plummet thus making me slow and tired.
Lets hope I feel better tomorrow.
Enough of that, I should considered myself fortunate to only be tired. Go leave Trancejen a note of encouragement. She is haveing one hell of a time. I get angry reading Trancejen's accounts of dealing with doctors. I also understand that it happens way to often. My mother was "diagnosed" with multiple sclerosis in 1958. Now you must remember in 1958 there were no MRI's to detect the damage to the myelin shealth around the nerves. They only had spinal taps to diagnose with and when they performed a spinal tap on my mother they hit things a little wrong. She was deaf for a while afterward. She got over the side effects of the test but never got over the doctors telling my father that she should never know her diagnosis. She found out after a while. Who would go through life falling down for no apparent reason and not raise hell to find out why it is happening? Shortly after all this I was born. Now what happens for some "lucky" women with MS is they have a remission after giving birth. Go figure. Is this natures way of making sure the next generation gets into this world OK? Anyway, she had a five year remission after I was born. Then she started falling again. Her right leg began to drag and she had to use a cane most days. From there it was a slow but steady loss of the ability to walk. We never had glasses in my house as a child because my mother dropped things. My mother couldn't drive me to my friends house because she simply couldn't drive. Through all this she was given steroids, painkillers, anti-inflamatory drugs, and regular admonishments that most of her symptoms were "all in her head".
My mother fought long and hard to keep walking even if it was only from the chair to the bathroom until finally, in December of 1996, she just couldn't walk anymore. That was the first christmas she did not attend our family get together. She just couldn't transfer from the wheelchair to the car seat. I told our extended family I was pregnant and my parents were not there. She now spends her time in bed and mostly isn't sure who I am. She still resents being told it was all in her head - that she will never forget.
I never forget that doctors are just overeducated human beings who make mistakes and have rather large egos. I make sure I am educated about any illness that comes along and I have learned to treat myself and my family with herbs, homeopathy, and good old common sense. Doctors are an important part of the healthcare system but we must take responsibilty for our health also, through prevention, education, and self care.
(Steps down off soapbox)
Sorry, but I get a little worked up about these things. So anyway, go say Hi to Trance and send her some healing energy while you are at it.
Now I think I will take my own advice and self treat my exhaustion by going to bed.
written at 8:55 p.m.
2004-03-07
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