DRIVEN
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moon phases � |
I am having major problems with zoning out. Do you know what I mean? Those times when the mind wanders deeply into the details of some event current or past or imagined and basically gets hopelessly lost. I really don't mind too much when this happens as a rule. As a matter of fact it can prove to be quite usefull as a problem solving tool. What is bothering me lately is the fact that this has been happening while I am driving. Now, I do some of my best thinking while driving. Most likely because I came of age behind the wheel of a car.
I got my license at sixteen and my first car at seventeen. Once I had that car everything happened on wheels. Conversations, revelations, parties and rages. Contained and maintained in the comfort of an automobile. First it was a purple Gremlin cutomized with paintings of the yellow submarine and gentle flying glove, a starfield on the ceiling and one of the longest gum warpper chains I have ever seen. Then it was a bicentennial edition Dodge Colt that was white with red and blue pinstipes. That car was named Tinkerbell and if she wasn't going fast enough everyone would clap for encouragment. Failing better speed from clapping flapping the doors was tried. When Tink conked out I got my first (and possibly only) brand new car. A Honda CRX. Two passanger tiny tot car in dark blue and silver. More a go cart than an automobile whipping around curves at alarming speeds while Born To Run blares from the stereo. Two seater cars are not so practical with an infant so for a bit I drove the conversion van I transport my mother in but I eventually went back to the CRX until the floor began to rot away and I was sure I would be left sitting on the pavement at a stop light and the car would be rolling on down the highway without me. Now I drive a Ford Escort with funky red and grey stripes and an alarming amount of crumbs and other mysterious detrious in the back seat.
Oh, so anyway, I was trying to explain that I have been going off on some major tangents while driving. So bad that Sunday as I was driving the three miles down the road to take A. to the park I panicked at the 2.5 mile mark and asked A. in an anxious voice if I had driven past the park. While this morning I was driving back from taking A. to school and was to stop off at the Mistress's house and had to pull over because I couldn't decide if I had passed the side road I needed to take.
I am convinced I will drive mindlessly to Montana one morning on the way home from A's school.
I would love to go to Montana but I would prefer a planned trip.
Clearly I have too much (or too little) on my mind.
written at 8:42 p.m.
2004-09-21
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