OBSTACLES
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moon phases � |
Just read a headline on Yahoo!. It read, "Obesity is a Major Obstacle to a Good Sex Life". Didn't take a rocket scientist to figure that one out. Now, honestly, who am I to talk about the logistics of obeses sex? I am not fat. I haven't has sex in nearly four years. Not a good position (ha) to be formulating an opinoin on this topic from. You know what, though, I do have an opinion. Ya, wanna know why? Well even if you don't I am going to share it with you. First and foremost I would have to say that the epidemic of both obesity and sex obsession in our society is a bit frightening. Take for example the fact that I watch very little TV but the little I do watch is riddled with commercials addressing just these issues. Am I skinny enough or am I a fat blob? Am I sexy enough or do I need to change my hair color, make-up, deodorant, my feminine hygeine product, or the brand of peanut butter I am smearing all over bits of my partners anotomy? Then I have to consider whether or not my counters are teaming with bacteria that should be eradicated or perhaps if the brand of air freshener I use is vibrant enough.
Can you think of any other reasons to throw up your hands and scream, "I don't give a shit if I ever get laid again, just shut the fuck up". That opinion might be slightly colored by the fact that my husband is not an option and I can't imagine having to consider all this other shit just to get a little huggy.
Just think, my hormones are not even in a place that any of this matters. I just got all bitchy over a silly little headline on some dumb information greedy website. Clearly not feeling well has left me with more time than I need to contemplate inane social issues like obese sex.
I wonder if anyone has done a study on the hazards of skinny sex. Just imagine the bruising that can happen when you have protruding hipbones colliding with a matching set of protruding hipbones. Or what about the unpadded sternum wacking into the ribcage of a partner. These things could cause serious discomfort. Battered bones too close to the surface present a whole different set of obstacles to a good sex life.
This is Dr. Ruth signing off. Goodnight and have an orgasmic tomorrow.
written at 8:47 p.m.
2004-11-21
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