WUZZY THOUGHTS
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moon phases � |
Well I am sort of better. I can at least keep my eyes open for a part of the day.
I am not sure I have anything interesting to report. Considering I haven't been doing much or paying much attention to anything.
The fence for the new goat pasture is done. It is a wonderful place to just sit while the girls browse. It is far enough away from the house that I am pretty much safe from intrusion. I had the girls down there yesterday and then today. Ambition went home yesterday so today I had the two doelings with the big girls. Rainbow is giving them firm instruction about their future place in the herd (lowest of the low).
I went to the counseling person, who we will call Wendy, today. She is pleasant enough to talk to and has confirmed that I am not suffering from warped perceptions. There is comfort in that. She thinks Rainman should be talking to someone (duh) and maybe he should be there with me for reality check. Maybe, I just don't see him changing. He would in all likelyhood paint a less than realistic picture. As in not admitting to the regularity of his drinking or the underlying cause of that behaviour (whatever that might be). He has built a very thick wall around himself that I would think would take a long time to chip away at.
I would just like to not be irritated by him. I have been making it a point to keep my words short and to the point with him. It seems to avoid some of the useless confrontation that has been epidemic around here. It is very hard to bite my tongue sometimes but I have been. It is always depressing to go into the holidays with this shit going on. It is hard to enjoy the season when "family" is disjointed.
I am trying to plan some fun stuff to do with A. this winter. I have noted the discounted days at a local ski area so I can take her for her first ski trip. We will be ice skating at the park of course. Hiking is possible if I can come up with some shorter routes. I just need to not get bogged down in the shit and have a little fun.
Well that is about it. Not much but what can I say, my head is still wuzzy.
written at 8:21 p.m.
2004-11-16
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